View photo
  • 5 hours ago
  • 57510

leonkumquat:

when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank

they’re married now

View text
  • 5 hours ago
  • 134690

nasturbate:

prosetitute:

I’M DYING

STOP HARASSING YOUR PARENTS but also keep doing it because i just laughed so hard my soul escaped my body

View video
  • 5 hours ago
  • 285982
View photo
  • 5 hours ago
  • 3019
View photo
  • 5 hours ago
  • 1049
View photo
  • 5 hours ago
  • 66
View photo
  • 5 hours ago
  • 85

carpios:

more celebrities should just be like rihanna in regards to hate

image

View text
  • 1 week ago
  • 273271
View photo
  • 1 week ago
  • 3387
View photo
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 920

senpai-with-benefits:

malicewondrland:

A few days ago someone told another cashier at the Walmart I work at that I shouldn’t be allowed to be employed because I’m corrupting the children with how I look.. This is what I looked like that day:image

I wish I saw who she was so I could greet her on my day off.. I’ll corrupt her fuckin’ children alright. That’s a promise.

imageWelcome to Walmart, motherfucker.

my mom would actually love you omfg

View text
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 34447
View photo
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 424457
View photo
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 13952

Being in a relationship ends in one of two ways; breaking up or death. When you think about it like that, love really is doomed from the beginning yet we continue to nearly kill ourselves anyway just to taste it.

(via ichfuehlmich-funky)
View quote
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 95146
View photo
  • 2 weeks ago
  • 45093
x